Parting is an event changing the worldview and forcing it to think about building relationships with a future partner. After a break, the man is experiencing a lot of emotions: starting with anger, resentment, hatred, ending with relief, accepting, feeling integrity and readiness for adopting new love.
But how to be if a former partner presents a gift? Do not accept - it means to upset yourself, and the donant, therefore a reasonable question arises: how to get a gift and thank the ex-partner? Below are several tips from the editorial board 24cm.
Cause of parting
According to research conducted in the journal Personal Relations, there are 4 reasons for maintaining relations with former partners:
- Jointly acquired (children, property, business, finance);
- Safety (a person has lost its importance as a love partner, but remains another, closely emotionally or spiritually);
- Politeness (due to their convictions, a person is confident that to congratulate on the holiday, maintain communication - a sign of good tone);
- Romantic desires (Open Gestalt - a sense of dissatisfaction and nonresistance between partners).
Father and friend
If the first two points are applicable to relationships, then the building of personal borders concerns not only communication with children, approval of meetings, the definitions of the taboo, but also the mark of attention of the objective format. Gratitude is a voluntary man's desire. Tip: Limit as a brief "Thank you, I am pleased with", and officially business (provided that these attitudes are) "Thank you for your attention." In the tone of the appeal, a hint of the relationship is not allowed, the answer is brief, clearly, restrained.Politeness and feelings
In the last two points, communication and gifts will lead to even greater uncertainty. Taking a gift from the former partner, you give hope for renewing relationships. If you do not want it, do not smile, do not flirt, do not show bright emotions.
"Thank you, I am very pleased that you showed concern about me. You always know what I love, you still have a stay at home? " - Invalid option.
Former and present
If the relationship has long lost its meaning or a new partner has appeared in life, the gift will cause fair questions of the beloved about how close this person to you, for what purpose and in what circumstances a gift was presented. In such cases, besides the duty "Thank you", ask if the donation with himself is hidden meaning and duties: "Thank you, should I do anything in exchange?", "Your gift for something obliges me?".
Regardless of how attitudes ended, be polite, friendly and friendly - this is observing the rules of etiquette against other people. You should not begin to find out the relationship, to be angry, run away, even if you were offended or spreading unilent facts from life. Aggression generates aggression: be mutually polite.