Each person was heard the word "no", whether it was refusing a potential client or a fabricated girl (or a guy). And it is always unpleasant. But sometimes the reluctance to hear a negative answer to his request from the interlocutor and is at all acquiring the shape of a painful phobia. And then it is necessary to make a lot of effort to overcome the fear of the next refusal.
On the psychologists offered by psychologists, the methods of getting rid of such fear are in the material 24cm.
1. "No" is not a sentence
The first step on the way, the purpose of which is to overcome the fear of the likely refusal, will be aware that life is possible after "no". Indeed, if you analyze the likely scenarios for the development of events after the negative response of the interlocutor, it is not difficult to understand that in 90% of cases, nothing terrible for refusing will not follow.Of course, there are situations where the positive reaction for an extremely important and may even affect the life and health of relatives. But in such cases, the person will be worried and embarrassed, in the habit of whom the excitement for a possible refusal is not at all. In other circumstances, after the negative response, the tragedy does not happen, and therefore, it is not necessary to get involved in the experiences on this topic.
2. Nothing personal
Psychologists are noticed that the fear of hearing "no" is associated with unhealthy associations - the person is confident that it was the reason for the refusal. It turned out to be an unnecessary positive response. Especially severe in such cases, depression in people who still suffer from youthful maximalism and seeking what is happening around regarding relations to their own person.
But in most cases, the mood of the latter is responsible for the negative reaction from the interlocutor. Headache, inclipboard, quarrel with parents or second half - and please, the manager remains without a "closed" sale, and a young man without a date with a young beauty.
But it is impossible to forget that under the other conditions turned well to hear "yes." If there were no factors that destroyed the benevolent attitude of him visa.
3. On the way to the better
Assistance in overcoming fear before failures will also have another curious way. It is enough to convince yourself that every "no" is, on the one hand, a brick in the wall of accumulating life experience, and on the other - the next step on the way for the better.That is, to achieve an understanding that the refused person just pushes to the search for more appropriate solutions to one or another task. Or to the choice of the ideal second half, if we are talking about interpersonal relationships.
4. Do not build forecasts
To overcome the fear of probable "no" perhaps, stopping forecasting. Since in the case of such attempts, people (with the exception of self-confident "one hundred percentage") tend to add to themselves, "predicting" a negative result.
Therefore, they manage to believe in the hopelessness of their own endeavalation, even before they ask the question or turn out for help. And rather waiting for the negative, rather than hope for a positive decision.
It is worth remembering that a person, pre-ready for failure, involuntarily projects his own attitude towards the situation and to whom it appeals. And the latter, feeling the emotional background of the interlocutor, seeks to stop the conversation, and therefore it says "no", breaking the right. So the faithful strategy is to stop the depression in your own consciousness and surrender to the will of the case.
5. Understand the reasons
An excellent method that allows you to overcome the fear of "no" - to ask those who answered negative about the reasons for such a decision. This will give, on the one hand, to accumulate experience that will allow in the future to evaluate the chances of "victory." And at the same time will give the opportunity to "second occasion". After all, a person telling about the causes of the "no" pronounced causes, its own initial conclusions are capable of explaining and revised.Naturally, the question is required to be specified correctly and gently, in order not to provoke the respondent on aggression.
6. Life is a game
Another technique recommended by psychologists seeking to get rid of the fear of negative answers, prescribes to submit the process of setting the request and obtain a decision on it as a game. In other words, abstract from emotions and approach the question with a fraction of frivolism.
Especially since, as in the game, the achievement of a positive result is not limited to the only possibility. It is probably even with the "failure of the negotiations", nothing will prevent the attempt to repeat later. And it does not matter, concerns business partnership case, getting a loan or desire to conquer the heart of the person liked.
7. In battle for confidence
Often with the need to fight with your own fear of failures, you have to people in uncertain. The latter seems that those flaws that they revealed in themselves are known and surrounding. Although in reality, nothing like this is observed.
Therefore, in order to overcome the fear of "no", you will have to overcome uncertainty. And for these purposes, do not training personality growth or visit to a psychologist (except in cases of psychotrams). And self-control and sports activities - nothing gives confidence in your own forces, like a beautiful and healthy body. Plus, workouts help distract from negative and not to drive themselves into depression, as well as develop perseverance in character.